A few weeks ago we had a storm come through our area. I am one of those people who love summer storms, although I do prefer day storms to night storms. My kids, however, don't care for storms whether they come during the day or the night. My two youngest especially don't like storms. The other night when this storm came, there were 2 extra (small) people in our bed. :) Normally if the kids are not with us when a storm comes there can be tears, looks and/or questions of concern, and if it happens to be at night requests for a campout in Dad and Mom's room.
The storm continued and I remember after one particularly bright flash of lighting, thinking "oh, boy, the thunder is going to be really loud this time." and sort of bracing myself for the littles' responses. The thunder was loud, really loud, it was the kind that you can almost feel traveling from somewhere above the house down into the ground.
The thunder came and went, and my room remained silent...
I half sat up in bed and looked over, and as another flash of lightning illuminated the bedroom I saw my 2 smallest children, the ones most afraid of storms, soundly sleeping.
The last huge, deep rumble of thunder didn't bother them in the least. As I sat there looking at them for the next few seconds, it was in that time I heard the Lord's gentle whisperings.
I love those whisperings, so gentle, but so profound at times, and most often in my case they come at the most interesting times. :) It was less then a minute of the Father speaking to my heart, but what He spoke was not only a revelation in a sense to me, it was also equipping me for things to come (though I didn't know that yet).
I remember looking at my sleeping children and wondering how it was that through this storm they were able to sleep so contentedly? I thought of this verse in Matthew 8:24 "Without warning, a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping." My first thoughts were, "well, Jesus is God, of course He can sleep through a storm." As I was still looking at my kids so soundly sleeping, the Lord began His whisperings...
My smallest ones, who are so afraid of storms were able to sleep so peacefully because they knew they were and felt completely safe. They trust that being with me or their dad makes them safe, and they no longer need to fear the storm.
A smile crossed my face, another flash or 2 of lightning illuminated the room, and then I heard...
"That's how I want you to trust Me through life's storms."
It took me a moment to soak that in.
It's one thing to have a head knowledge of how to handle something, it's quite another thing when God speaks it directly to your heart, and that head knowledge becomes heart knowledge!
That was it, a few moments of tender whisperings.
I laid awake for a while after thinking, wanting to almost re-live those moments a few times over so as not to forget them anytime soon.
As days went on I was still thinking about that night, and asking the Lord questions and Him answering me, and again without my realizing it, He was equipping me for my own storms that were coming.
Much to my surprise, though looking back now, I really shouldn't have been surprised, a "life storm" blew in, I think less then a week after this night.
This storm, at it's peak had the potential to bring our adoption plans to a complete stop for close to 2 years. In the midst of this I remember crying out to the Lord, not understanding what was going on, or how the timing of things made sense. He reminded me of my children sleeping through the storm. Was I going to trust Him no matter the outcome? Was I going to believe that He is still in control? Was I going to be able to rest in this? My hesitant answer was "yes". However, I don't think I was able to rest until the storm was over.
The storm was fierce but short. And when it was over, I was lamenting over my reaction, feeling that my reaction was not what it should've been. And the Lord, again whispering, answered me...
"You came to Me." "You trusted Me with what you had."
I began to understand more. It wasn't so much how I initially reacted, though I want to work on that, that God was working on, it was my reaction, my living through the storm.
He's showing me the importance of keeping my eyes on Him, crying out to Him...sometimes over and over and over concerning the same thing.
He's showing me that regardless of what I'm feeling, whether I understand, or even if I'm afraid, if I can trust Him completely (or as much as I know how), and believe that He's in control no matter what...
Rest will come in the storm.
I know that what I'm sharing is not new, but it's an area that God is working on me in a new way.
Adoption is a storm...much of it is, and though I'm a work in progress, I'm learning to rest in the storm.
"He stilled the storm to a whisper; the waves of the sea were hushed." Psalm 107:29
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